Acceptance

It's not easy to find an image for most blog posts. What can adequately represent diabetes in a single photo? I mean, apart from a train crash or a person screaming. Insulin seems to cover the subject pretty well. I think most people understand what an insulin pen or a vial of Banting Juice means, these days. 

It gets more difficult (to choose an image) when talking about the nuances of the condition. I think that's especially true when referring to the mental aspects of diabetes. The screaming person might work? Perhaps not for the subject of todays post; Acceptance. 

The seed for this post was planted when I read through a thread on social media. An exasperated person exclaimed "Have I got to do this for the rest of my life". It struck a chord with me, I've been there, I've said the same openly and privately over the last near 40 years. 

The first time the daunting reality of type one diabetes gave me a slap in the face was soon after my diagnosis. I had been home for only a day or two when I questioned how long I'll need to have injections for? The answer, from my mum, was truthful - forever. I've written about that story previously, you may have read it if you're a regular reader of my blog posts. Over the years, and probably following momentous diabetes events, I silently consider the condition again and how it is "forever." 

Those events? Complications are pretty high on the list. Generally, for me at least, T1D is 99% tedious, 1% terror. Complications are terrifying. If you went to your eye screening and came away with some news that was less than good, and you didn't have a little moment, then I question your humanity. Of course, there are many other examples including kidney problems, heart, etc, but you get the gist. Alongside coming to terms with the burden of this condition, diabetics have to somehow find an acceptance of what might never happen, or what is already happening because of it. Complications really do suck. 

I came to an acceptance of my T1D after a very long time. It involved; not hiding it, talking to my peers, ranting on social media, and learning all I could. I even have a Type 1 Diabetic tattoo. I think it's pretty safe to say that I'm alright with this condition being with me forever. "Alright" doesn't mean happy, far from it. I would give all I have to be free of this pissing evil. I know that's unlikely in my lifetime and I don't build up my hopes of a cure. 

So, the thread. I recognised the frustration and fear and anger in those words. I recognise how it is all amplified when a doctor, or a badly worded letter, has news that something might be wrong because of your diabetes. That background music is suddenly the dominant noise. 

I don't know if acceptance of complications or the prospect of complications is an easy thing to achieve. How do you accept what is terrifying? My own eye complications have been stable for a number of years now. The visual impairment that I was left with took several years, and some poor life choices, to come to terms with. Today, I'm a "it is what it is" type but, just like the disease that caused my VI, I would give all I have to be free of it and to have my old sight restored. Acceptance, being alright with it, does not mean happy with it.

Today is "Blue Monday" - the most depressing day of the year by all accounts. It seems appropriate that blue is associated with diabetes, a condition that undoubtedly causes depression in so many.

If you were affected by any of the words in this blog post, by diabetes, complications, or any aspect of your life today, tomorrow or any day then please seek out support. 

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I Was Feeling Complicated...

...I was feeling low. Annie Lennox is bloody brilliant, isn't she? The song is Thorn In My Side by Eurythmics, and you'll probably be unaware of it if you're under 35. Put it on your Spotify while you read this post.

This post is about diabetes related complications. If the subject is too difficult for you, then please come back again for another post in the future. Normally, I wouldn't bother to put a trigger warning like that because I'm a "warts and all" diabetes blogger. However, I understand that the subject can be upsetting for people who live with diabetes and their loved ones because it is so utterly dreadful. So, if you're still here, let's begin.

The story of my own diabetes related complications has been well documented in this blog and across my social media accounts. If you're unaware, and in short, I suffered severe eye complications from around 2010 - 2012. I had several surgeries and I spent a good deal of those two years living in near blindness. Things improved and although I am "registered as blind" I am far from it. The reality is I have a visual impairment that does impact my day to day living... actually day to night living, my night vision is shocking, and I need to wear specs to read and write incredible blog posts such as this one.

As I head rapidly towards 40 years with T1D, I count myself lucky to only have had that experience of complications. Oh, if I could change history and not go through that then I absolutely would! I count myself lucky because I know many others who have been through more, much more, much worse and they keep on fighting with lots more day to day (or night) issues than I have. Also, as I've aged (matured?) with my eye complications and embraced the lived experience of others with T1D, I have come to realise something:

I was wrong.

An admission of being incorrect is a tough one to express. It's rare to read of anybody back-tracking and changing a firmly held view. I don't know why, as human beings, we're so proud about always being right. I mean, just by pure chance, sometimes you'll be wrong... right? Anyway! Why was I wrong? Well, for several years and up until very recently I've harboured a feeling of self-blame for my eye complications. I may have even written about it a few years ago, but then I never touched on the subject again. Pride? Over time, and with more experience, I've come to realise that I've been wrong to shoulder the blame for what I went through.

I'm not going to shift the blame for my complications to another person. Why it happened, is down to one thing; Type 1 Diabetes. After that, the reasons don't really matter. History cannot be changed. Yet, for a long time I put the blame on myself, the missed appointments, literally running out of an appointment for laser surgery, hiding away and pretending it wasn't happening. 

To run away from you

Was all that I could do

Annie was probably referring to an ex-lover. For me, to run away from those scary appointments felt like my only option, the easy option, and I was an adult. Nobody was forcing me to attend. Indeed, nobody would chase up missed appointments or why I'd scarpered part-way through laser surgery. Why would they? DNA (Did Not Attend) is a common thing in the NHS and the reasons for that can be complex rather than simply the patient just doesn't care about themselves. If the patient doesn't care about themselves, surely they are in the greatest need of the soonest care? A discussion or a blog post for another time, perhaps.

I should've known better

But I got what I deserved

Was exactly my thoughts for many years. I was told by enough healthcare professionals. Yet, "told" is something we experience a lot when attending our diabetes reviews.

"You need to get your A1c down"

"You need to have less hypos"

"You need to check your blood glucose more often"

The list is long and, if you have T1D, you've probably got your own extensive list of "tolds". 

Modern care has come to realise that the harsh approach, the scaremongering, doesn't work very well on the whole. I agree. It clearly didn't work for me having been subjected to scaremongering from an early age. Perhaps if all of my diabetes history was analysed, those early years were the seeds planted for my mid-life complications harvest. Who knows? Again, I'm not shifting blame for my complications to another person or persons. Diabetes got me here, my own immune system did the dirty work. What followed was a war and in every war there is suffering - my left retina took the brunt.

Complications are indeed a thorn in my side, today. Hopefully, they won't be for you. If you do get some bad news, I have some words for you:

It's not your fault. Don't put yourself through what I have for a decade.

Complications treatments are as good as they've ever been.

Be brave. You're only here once and you matter.

Things will get better or settle down. 

Seek support. The NHS might offer it to you - take it! 

Talk and share. The huge #GBDoc community has more experience than any clinic. We got you.

This post was tougher to write than I expected. Thanks for giving me a few minutes of your time.

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Keep Me In The Loop

Type 1 Diabetes tech can advance pretty quickly. Even access to it, in some areas, has greatly improved in recent times and for that we have much to be grateful for. Of course, there is far more to do than has already been done. There are many who struggle to access some very basic things and, in the UK at least, a yawning disparity in care is obvious between areas. If the playing field will ever be levelled is debatable. With my most optimistic hat on, it seems certain to be a drawn process, as with many aspects of NHS care.

Yet! We continue to advance diabetes care in the UK (probably beyond) thanks to a little thing called "Peer support" Actually, it's not little at all. In terms of numbers, the peer support groups both online and in person, have grown enormously over the last few years. Indeed, you'll see diabetes-care-engaged HCPs communicating with these groups, recognising their importance, referring patients, etc. 

For me, it's not little at all in terms of the impact on my health and life.

Back in 2017, I had recently reached a "milestone age" and after going through a great deal of diabetes related issues I thought it was time to get to grips with my T1D. The story is long and rather dull, in short it involved creating social media and forum accounts, sharing, learning and trying to be the best diabetic that I could be. I anticipated that I'd be largely on my own, that I'd pick up a few useful tips among the keto scams and cinnamon cures. I was wrong, I was definitely not on my own.

If you arrived here via Twitter, there is a great chance that you already know about #GBDoc. It is a tremendous community, run entirely by volunteers who just want to learn and stay well as much as everyone else. I mention the hashtag often and I do promote the community when the opportunity arises. I don't run it or have any influence in what happens. I'm a volunteer, learning, trying to stay well and hopefully assisting others in the same.

I try to give as much as possible to my peers within #GBDoc because since day one I have been inundated with kindness. Sure, as with any community, there will be disagreements and people will come and go. Yet, the core of #GBDoc has remained and from everything I've read and learned, I believe the community has evolved into a more inclusive, community driven, place rather than the individually run entity it once was.

In the last six and a half years, I have met hundreds of community members in person. I'm very likely to meet hundreds more. Each time, it was a delight. I love to learn about others, to talk, to laugh and to share experiences. From the hundreds, I have close bonds with many people who are now incredibly good friends. If you enjoy socialising then #GBDoc can certainly improve that aspect of your life!

Let's focus on the direct impact that peer support has had on my health. In 2017, I was finger pricking and injecting and that was the extent of my T1D management. Today, I write this blog post as somebody who is using Hybrid Closed Loop to manage my diabetes. Essentially, an insulin pump is communicating with a CGM to make frequent adjustments to my insulin dose without my input, aside from entering carb counts and other very minimal-effort engagements (see the photo used for this post). If you don't have T1D, your pancreas does a similar job, but this is not an artificial pancreas. I'll blog more about HCL in a week or two. 

HCL is the latest development from my accessing of the peer support in #GBDoc. Before that, there have been many other examples of help from the community members. Items include:

- A donated insulin pump

- Many donated insulin pump consumables

- CGM transmitters

- CGM and Flash sensors

- Ketones test strips

- Glucose drinks

- Sweets, chocolates, lots of coffees!

The last one might not be hugely impactful on my diabetes management, but it helps and they were much appreciated! I didn't ask for any of those items. Various individuals took it upon themselves to offer their time, energy and money to help me. The physical items are one thing, the enormous amount of education is something else. There really is no better place to learn about T1D than from those who live with it. Every little snippet of info, every little trick, hack, guidance and signposting is a little bit more ammunition to go to war with. Over the years, I've absorbed it all. It feels like I've studied for a medical degree in some respects.

Of course, I do what I can to give back. "Pay it forward" is the often used term for a good deed. I won't list my involvements in diabetes related initiatives in this post. This post is about the others who do wonderful, kind, things for people without really realising the positive impact it can have. You are saving lives, prolonging lives, improving lives. I don't write that sentence flippantly. I truly believe it. You may never be officially recognised, but I see you. Thank you.

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Diabetes and Blood Pressure

You don't need to have diabetes to know that blood pressure is a thing, an important thing! High, low and somewhere in between - you've most likely had your blood pressure checked at some stage and learned of the results pretty quickly. Me too! I submit to an arm squeezing at every appointment, In fact, I'm pretty sure that I had my BP checked at my pump set up appointment because... I don't know why. It just happened along with my height and weight. Glad to know I'm not too fat or short for pump funding! Phew! There is probably a NICE criteria for that.

BP at appointments, yes! let's focus on that one. I'm one of those "White Coat Syndrome" types. I know that's not the official name for it. Language Matters probably covers it under "Person with anxiety of medical professionals wearing light coloured lab coats" However you describe it, I have it. I think it stems from a real fear of attending my diabetes reviews as a child. If I wasn't passing out from the blood tests, I was being told off about my control, threatened with trips to the amputation ward or working extra hard on my blood glucose diary fiction for the last 90 days. It wasn't a great experience and it stayed that way for a long time.

Medical appointments, I suspect, are not designed to be fun. Today, they're less stressful but they're still not a day out with friends for a lovely lunch and a drink or two. They usually involve losing some of my blood and urine to a stranger and the fear of some terrible news lurks in the back of my mind at each visit to a waiting room... which is always too warm and always contains some absolute knob, coughing up their infectious disease in my face. I'm going off on a tangent. You get my drift, I'm sure. 

Those settings appear to be unwittingly designed to increase our anxiety. For me, that appears to translate into elevated blood pressure, almost every time without fail. I've left many appointments with a rented BP machine tucked under my arm for home readings. On at least one occasion I took 24 hours worth of readings. More commonly, I'm asked to provide 7 days worth of home results. And I do! Of course I do. And they're always normal / within a healthy range or near to it, such as this one from last night:

That's reassuring, of course! I have enough to contend with without hypertension coming out to play. However, it's becoming a little tiresome to be told that my BP is "a bit high" in clinic when it's the clinic setting causing my numbers to nudge up. As is my want, I vented about this on Twitter only a week or two ago. David rightly noted that not only do they check for BP on these machines, they also check for irregular heart beats. I'm pretty sure that my home monitor (above) doesn't offer that function. I'm good with heart checks. We're often told that T1D can increase the chances of heart disease so, it makes great sense to have that particular organ checked out. Blood pressure can give our kidneys something to think about, too on top of the work T1D gives to them.

BP in clinic, though? I'm not alright with that one right now. I'll be providing my own readings and requesting that any taken during a heart check are ignored and not noted. That's going to be an interesting chat with that HCP, isn't it?! 

We check our blood glucose a lot through CGMs and finger pricks. We try to keep it in a healthy range because that reduces our chances of diabetes related complications. Blood pressure is very important for many aspects of our health, too. I believe that frequent monitoring of BP should be seen as an essential aspect of T1D care but that frequent monitoring should be done in our usual day to day environments; home and work. Unusual settings, such as diabetes review appointments, are not places to obtain reliable blood pressure readings. 

Blood pressure monitors are relatively cheap these days. It seems unlikely that the NHS would fund BP monitors for all diabetics so, if you can afford to pick one up, I do recommend getting one for a useful and accurate picture of your blood pressure.

And relax!

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Diabetes Is Work

I don't know how many jobs we're supposed to have on average in our lifetime, I'm sure there is a study or some incredibly scientific research somewhere or maybe you already know? Let me know in the comments at the bottom of the blog if you do. Work? But, this is a diabetes blog! That's true, diabetes and ranting - often the two go hand in hand. However, my time spent in diabetes advocacy, supporting others, tapping out blog posts like this one, creating videos, talking to media... you get the idea, has steadily increased in the last three or four years. Something, unfortunately, has to give.

You may know that I've spent the last decade or so as a self employed worker. The benefits of that type of working life are many; working when I choose, always being employee of the month, etc but there are many cons to that too; no holiday pay, no sickness pay, working 100 hours a week, working 2 hours a week, etc - let's just say that it's not a stable way to earn a living, a little like playing a violin on the Titanic. Everything is lovely for periods and everything is not lovely for other periods and sometimes you're going to drown. 

What do I do? - I get asked this at nearly every diabetes conference or meet up! I make people feel beautiful. I sell cosmetics, at least, I used to. Now, not so much.

A quick look at what that job entails. I buy stock from wholesalers and flog it on the Internet. It's gone reasonably well although, I had no intention of doing the job for so long and I've backed away from that in the last three or four years. See paragraph one as to why that might be.

Not only has diabetes "stuff" begun to fill up more and more of my time and much as I hate to admit it, I've aged. 46 revolutions around the sun at the last count. I've also developed osteoarthritis in a shoulder which makes the lifting of heavy boxes a bigger struggle than ever before. Clearly, this vocation is no longer for me on a full time basis and I need to do something less physically demanding. 

From 2005 to 2010, I worked in the poker industry as well as playing the game to a pretty high level. My work in that industry taught me a lot about online marketing, socials and optimising for the almighty Google. I suspect that my blog does better than it might for that knowledge. So, is SEO the next step? While that's a perfectly fine form of work, it is rather like accounting; incredibly dull (I was once an assistant accountant, too). Work, at my age, needs to be a fulfilling thing as well as put food on the table. 

And back we go to diabetes advocacy. I love the diabetes community almost without exception. I've gained so much from my peers and friends that I doubt I could ever repay them. I do try, though and rarely does a day or two go by without somebody reaching out to me for some guidance. Sometimes the reaching out has been aggressive or tainted with accusations - still, I tried to help as best as I could as I try to see the good in everybody and I suspect frustrations can rise to the surface very easily when it involves our health. When it goes right, when a person gets the support which improves their life with diabetes, the satisfaction is enormous. I really can't compare it to anything else. There are a few examples of that, from late night messages about a dosage error to getting several people approved for an insulin pump and everything in between. It doesn't feel like work because I feel like I'm helping friends and I'll continue to do that for as long as I'm able. What it is, is time - You're understanding the image used for this post now, right?

Time is finite. There are 24 hours in a day, remove sleep time, eating, personal care, the demands of friends and family and you're left with a much lower number of hours in a day to work. That, of course, goes before such frivolous things such as going out and having fun. Time is very valuable and that's why we work for reward in the form of money. Perhaps if you work for the NHS, you work for very little money. We need that to buy our food, pay for the home we live in, pay for the energy to keep us warm and to help us go back to work again at the soonest opportunity to earn more money to do all the same things again. Wow! Now that I've written that, life is one endless depressing cycle of working and earning isn't it? Anyway! Most of us need to work to earn the money we need to live. 

I'm not changing anything that I do right now. If we have conversations then we always will, if I mentor you for free then that will continue, my socials and blog and vlogs and all that jazz will always be for free. What will happen is that I'll offer additional things and ask for a small amount of money for my time. You'll find details about such things at the bottom of this blog (The Blog Member link) and that's it. It'll start from £3 as an appreciation, a tip if you will, up to bigger sums for greater time-demanding support.

 I'm hopeful that means I can carry on doing the good things, the social posts, the talks, the articles and charity fundraising & volunteering while time dedicated to direct support and mentorship will no longer impact on my day to day income. Perhaps it'll mean that I can finally stop selling 20kgs of lipstick?! and concentrate my time on helping people to feel better rather than look great.  

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Taking Diabetes Advice

Happy New ear... Year! I hope 2023 is very kind to you and that your diabetes is more easily managed than ever before. 

I wrote about sharing our diabetes information, data and stories in my last blog post. If you read that post, you'll know that I'm very pro-sharing and the benefits of reading and listening to the lived experiences of my peers has been profound. I will go on to read and listen to my peers (now friends in many cases) and hopefully continue to learn more about my Type 1 Diabetes throughout 2023. Today, I'd like to bring up the subject of advice, why it's different to offering a lived experience story, why you shouldn't give advice and why you SHOULD take advice from the right people.

It is difficult to not offer a word of advice through social media at times. As I've aged with my T1D I've picked up a lot of useful information, tips and tricks along the way which I have stored in the space dominating, diabetes area of my brain. A person who is seemingly in need of advice is likely to pop up on socials regularly and if you're the sort who likes to help then the temptation is a strong one. So, why should we be cautious? T1D has many nuances, twists and turns, inexplicable happenings and sometimes it's just a driver of bizarre events. The very basics of the condition appear to be common from person to person but dig into the details and you'll find your peers, any peer, probably has a different reaction to any given thing. That makes giving advice a very dangerous thing to do. In the UK, we have trained professionals who are medically and legally allowed to offer certain types of advice. It's unlikely that @Johnny5543772 (might be a real account, apologies if that's you) has the right qualifications to offer you advice in regards to your health. It could be that Johnny has the right qualifications but no access to your medical notes, history, medications, allergies, etc. His advice, or the advice of any well meaning individual, might be sound but it could also be deadly. Giving and taking medical advice through social media seems like a big avoid to me.

Advice, of course, is not the same as offering your lived experience. Questions about T1D will appear on your timelines frequently but rarely are the answers black and white. Questions of technology accuracy, insulin speeds, skin reactions, even clinician reviews will likely differ from person to person. There are many more examples, I know, but you get the gist. Accuracy reviews are a particular gear grinder of mine and that's not because poor accuracy in blood glucose monitoring isn't important, it's an essential part of T1D management that needs to be reviewed, it's because we hear different stories from different people. For example; Libre 1 was a terribly inaccurate piece of equipment for me. I even made a couple of videos to highlight it however, I have since accepted that it worked very well for many others and it wasn't a case of Libre 1 being inaccurate, it was a case of Libre 1 being inaccurate for me. The same could be said about some versions of Dexcom. So, a question appears about a CGM; "Is CGM X accurate?" The answer can only be based on your experience of it or the second hand information about it from your friends. 

CGM accuracy is a rather specific subject, I won't dwell upon it, but hopefully you're understanding what I'm talking about - T1D and all that comes with it can be different from person to person. Advice from strangers should be taken with a large pinch of salt.

What about the people "in the know"? The qualified, your diabetes HCPs. It's been said that nobody knows T1D like a T1D and that's probably right in many respects. Let me tell you a little story which proves that the opposite can sometimes be true. In late November, I was set up with my T:Slim X2 pump and I was sceptical about the afternoon-long appointment. I was confident about setting up the device and it's on going usage, indeed I didn't learn a great deal of new things in that appointment but it was still worthwhile. The suggestion to change my basal rates was put to me and, to the amusement of the group, after a couple of minutes talking to the DSN, I announced "I'm sold! I'll give it a try". I'm glad that I did despite the logic not really settling in my brain. The new basal rates have increased my TIR (time in range) and my eA1c has reduced by 0.2%, fantastic. I also began to use the bolus wizard on the pump, following DSN advice. Both changes to my management have improved my T1D. I don't believe that my HCP has diabetes but her calculations and advice have been sound. 

While we're in the driving seat with our T1D and rarely do we see our diabetes team, sometimes the best advice will come from them and that's where I believe you should seek your medical advice while learning from the lived experiences of others and learning to trust your in your own. 

Thank you so much for reading this blog. I do appreciate your visit and your support. As you might know, I LOVE COFFEE! So I've teamed up with a thing called Buy Me A Coffee. If you enjoy my content and appreciate the time it takes to create such things then you can buy me a coffee! If you leave your Twitter @ name when you buy me a coffee, I will personally thank you. If you'd rather be anonymous then that's totally cool. Thanks for the caffeine!

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Oversharing in Diabetes

I remember writing about sharing information, data, stories in diabetes before, probably a year or two ago, and my thoughts on the subject haven't really changed much as we head towards 2023 but a few things have happened which have sparked conversation in the last year.

On the Twitter, I tweeted this about Sharing T1D yesterday. I'm fine with others liking or not liking to share their diabetes information. Health, including diabetes, is a very personal subject and often subjected to stigmatising remarks, bullying and sometimes just generally unhelpful (and often unsolicited) advice. Little wonder that some prefer to not share anything in regards to their own diabetes with the prospect of such negativity. I really understand that, I hid my T1D for a long time because I didn't want to hear the advice or the patronising encouragement or have to explain what it was, what type, do I have to inject... yadda, yadda. It was just so much easier to hide it for the majority of the time and social media is such an easy place to hide. It's easy to have lurker accounts on pretty much every platform, easy to sit back and read rather than joining in the conversations. Hiding and not sharing is a very safe place to be.

There is a safety aspect to consider when sharing, too. Who knows who lurks behind the keyboards of others and what their intentions might be? Only last summer, I was made aware of a prolonged period of stalking and accusational tweets aimed towards me from an Australian advocate account which I'd blocked some 18 months beforehand. Disturbing stuff which took me away from Twitter for a few days to consider my options. Thankfully, that episode came to an end once I'd brought it to public attention but it was shocking and upsetting. It's very easy to upset somebody on social media without trying and those we upset well, they might not have enough sandwiches for a picnic. How do we share but stay safe? There is no simple answer apart from avoid offering personal details to people who you don't know. Sometimes, even that might not be enough if a determined person wants to track you down, find your employer, etc.

So, is it worth it? Yes! I think that offering your story, your experiences, your info can be really helpful to your peers. I imagine that you've read something in regards to diabetes which you've found useful in how you manage your own diabetes. Maybe those words came from somebody living with the same type of diabetes, a person who was willing to share their experiences and information. That's why you should consider sharing your experiences and information! It is the cheapest and easiest way to "pay it forward". Of course, don't make it easy for the sandwich deprived to locate you in person, avoid publicising your phone number and sort code and if an unpleasant encounter does occur then my best advice is to ignore it. You might choose to use the mute function on your chosen platform rather than the block button to minimise the oxygen given to the angry fires. To not give oxygen to the fire has been a long term piece of advice of mine but I'm still guilty of doing the opposite from time to time. I'm only human and the urge to vent can be overwhelming in the face of serious sandwich deprivation. I'll try harder in 2023.

What about the feelings of others when you share? Perhaps you've had a great HbA1c, your best ever, and you hit your socials to spread the news and celebrate your good day. I suspect you'll mostly be met with encouragement and good cheer from your friends and peers. However, you may also be met with words which dissuade you from sharing such info because others might be having a tough time with their A1c or general diabetes management. I have a lot of sympathy for anybody who is struggling with their diabetes, I try to make myself available to anybody who needs to talk through groups, mentoring or just a simple message exchange but the struggles of others should never stop you talking about your own diabetes if you've had a good day or a good result. This condition is relentless and despite the tech advances it will continue to be so for the foreseeable. Little victories need to be celebrated, I find them to be morale boosting, I feel more in control of my diabetes and, when others share their wins, I feel encouraged by them and pleased for my peers.

To not share results or information through fear of upsetting others is a backwards step in peer support. If we were to stop sharing our lived experiences, what worked, what didn't, what hurts, what itches, a great A1c, a dodgy TIR, etc then how do we learn about advances in tech and medicine and care and solutions? Our diabetes team? Yeah - I'm not sure that the closed looping crowd would agree. I wouldn't agree, either. Without reading the experiences of my peers, I wouldn't have discovered Flash, CGM and insulin pump therapy as soon as I did - three things that massively improved my diabetes burden and numbers.

If you do feel negatively about the shared information or experiences of others then I think it might be worthwhile to seek support from different areas, especially if such sharing is becoming overwhelming to you and making your own diabetes burden even worse. 

I am pro-sharing when it comes to diabetes. It is the foundation of peer support, in my opinion and there are very few dangers from tweeting your last A1c result. Oversharing is where the dangers lie, keep your private info protected and remember that fire and oxygen thing.

Thank you so much for reading this blog. I do appreciate your visit and your support. As you might know, I LOVE COFFEE! So I've teamed up with a thing called Buy Me A Coffee. If you enjoy my content and appreciate the time it takes to create such things then you can buy me a coffee! If you leave your Twitter @ name when you buy me a coffee, I will personally thank you. If you'd rather be anonymous then that's totally cool. Thanks for the caffeine!

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Diabetic Christmas

Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas. It's that time of the year again! Fun, food and excess are on the agenda for many, including the diabetic community. Whaaaaaaaat? But, you can't have excess, food or fun if you have diabetes, can you?!

If you were to pay attention to many media outlets, websites and the social media accounts - often claiming to be a diabetes expert, doctor, lifestyle coach or miracle worker who can cure you of diabetes and herpes (!?), then! you might be forgiven for believing that Christmas and diabetes do not mix. I can't and won't talk about your diabetes in relation to Christmas, that's a ridiculous thing to attempt because I know very little about you and your diabetes or how Christmas impacts upon you. The common use of "We" when diabetes advocates talk about the condition has never sat well with me. "We" suggests to me that a person is expressing the views or conveying the words of a community largely or entirely. In reality "We" refers to the person behind the keyboard or microphone and perhaps a relatively small number of people who have diabetes. It's totally alright to use the word "I" when expressing yourself, I promise. So, with that little rant off my chest *I* have a few things to say about T1D and Christmas.

T1D because that's the diabetes I live with. I'm a Type 1 Diabetic. 

Christmas has historically been a tricky time of the year for me especially those first few years as a recently diagnosed diabetic. Looking back, the avoidance of chocolates and sweets and pursuing precise carb counting seemed very reasonable at the time. Strict "control" was hammered into me and my parents. Of course, I stole sweets and chocolates and had strangely elevated blood glucose for several years at Christmas time. That advice and care seems a lifetime ago and indeed it is, I've recently passed 38 years with T1D. Today, there is no advice offered to me unless you count the unsolicited, largely nonsense, advice offered via the sources mentioned above. Christmas was a tricky time but no longer. Why?

Education has played a large part in understanding my own T1D. That has emerged through the lived experiences of my friends and peers and, to some degree at least, the official information published by recognised authorities on the subject. Alongside the education, the tools of 2022 are a million miles better than the tools of 1984. Come to think of it, the tools of 1984 weren't much of a thing at all. Finger pricking took an age and involved popping down to B&Q for a colour chart. Berocca style tablets had to be dropped into a tube of your own urine and injecting insulin involved borrowing a javelin from Tessa Sanderson and mixing two different types of Banting Juice together yourself. Definitely not the good old days and before 1984 it wasn't exactly a rose garden either. The tools of today are simply incredible in comparison. A tiny pump and a CGM are attached to me and they're helping me to effectively manage my blood glucose and live a much less burdensome life than in the years gone by.

Less burden, well managed blood glucose... it sounds like Christmas might not be such a stressy diabetic experience now. It's not for me. If I know the carb count, I bolus for it. If I don't know the carb count then I'll guess and correct any mistakes later on. The CGM alerts me when I'm high or low OR even when I'm within 15 minutes of a high or low event. I can relax and enjoy what any other person might do during Christmas. That never seemed like a possibility to me when I was young and I'd simply given up on the idea of an easier diabetes during my 20s and 30s.

Apparently, life begins at 40! My diabetic life has certainly gone through a renaissance since I hit 40, since I grabbed the little shit by the neck and took charge, since I embraced and accepted it, since I discovered a huge community of peers - dozens of whom are now really great friends, since I pushed for the technology which I need to lift the burden and improve the numbers which I get a little obsessed about from time to time. 

A Diabetic Christmas feels like... Christmas! to me, at least. I hope it feels like that to you and that you have a relaxing and fun time with the people you love. If you're struggling for any reason then please don't feel that you're doing anything wrong. You're not a bad diabetic! Help and support is available through so many avenues that it would be almost impossible for me to list them all. Instead, don't give up. Seek the help that you need and push for the support, information, medications and technologies that you need for you and your diabetes. Merry Christmas.

  Thank you so much for reading this blog. I do appreciate your visit and your support. As you might know, I LOVE COFFEE! So I've teamed up with a thing called Buy Me A Coffee. If you enjoy my content and appreciate the time it takes to create such things then you can buy me a coffee! If you leave your Twitter @ name when you buy me a coffee, I will personally thank you. If you'd rather be anonymous then that's totally cool. Thanks for the caffeine!

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38

I find it difficult to avoid reflecting on events when an anniversary approaches. Sometimes, that reflection is very positive!- many great things have happened in my life. Sometimes, it's less positive and it's difficult to avoid wondering "what if..."

What if I wasn't diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes on my 8th birthday in 1984? How different might my life have been? Pretty deep questions and I imagine many of you have asked yourself the same. It's a pointless thing to do, of course, because we can't change what has been and each time I allow myself to ponder the impossible that is quickly where my thoughts finish. Acceptance is a massive part of living with diabetes and probably many other conditions and disabilities. With no cure in sight, it's important to play the hand that life gave to you. If you're still in the game then you haven't lost even if life dealt you a hand that looks like a foot. A diabetic foot?  No, let's not go there!

Acceptance is where I am with my T1D. It's given me a kicking, robbed me of various things not least some of my eyesight, yet I don't feel anger or upset towards it. I've been through the grief and it's a very normal thing to experience when you're diagnosed with a chronic illness and any complications from that - if you're going through that then please don't feel that it's wrong or weird. Hopefully, you'll get to the stage of acceptance and playing your foot of a hand as best as you can.

Acceptance is now, of course. I'm 45 (at the time of publishing) for one more day but who knows what 50 will look like? Will complications strike and leave me a bitter, yet young looking, 50 year old? Considering the future is a very middle aged thing to do, I think. Considering the future when you've had T1D for almost 4 decades brings up many different thoughts alongside the sports car, leather trousers and inappropriate relationships with women 20 years your junior. It's easy to slip into thinking the worst but maybe the focus should be on the possible good, if not great, things that the future could hold. Diabetes tech has exploded in the last 5 - 10 years. I write this blog post, today, with the most stable T1D that I've ever had thanks to technology, largely and peer support. There is no reason why that can't continue or even improve further. There is no reason for me to not be here in 30 years, 40 years or more, assuming I don't get hit by a bus or develop a terminal illness. That might be disappointing for some of you on social media but the same applies to you too. Life with T1D is improving all the time and while we might not witness a cure, I think we can still live full, exciting, wonderful lives if we embrace the condition and do what we can to manage it - that will differ from person to person, I know.

Young adult me didn't care about acceptance of T1D, teenage me preferred to ignore it and the 7 year old me who was desperately ill on this day 38 years ago just wanted to stop drinking water and peeing every 5 minutes, to play with his Star Wars toys. 

Perhaps peer support is the key in helping others to find acceptance. I try to offer support to others when I can. I've mentored, created areas for others to talk, promoted community, written articles, spoken on podcasts and radio shows and jumped at the chance of helping my friends and peers when the opportunity has presented itself. That might seem like a lot if you're juggling your family life and a full time job. It is! Sometimes, my day is full of work and diabetes advocacy from waking until I sleep again. I'm not complaining, I have taken far more from talking about diabetes than I have repaid. Talking about your diabetes is what you can do to support your peers. By doing that, you're normalising the condition and all the little annoyances, major traumas, sleep losses and victories which you experience. Talk honestly, use your own words and terminology - there is no wrong way to talk about your diabetes. 

 Thank you so much for reading this blog. I do appreciate your visit and your support. As you might know, I LOVE COFFEE! So I've teamed up with a thing called Buy Me A Coffee. If you enjoy my content and appreciate the time it takes to create such things then you can buy me a coffee! If you leave your Twitter @ name when you buy me a coffee, I will personally thank you. If you'd rather be anonymous then that's totally cool. Thanks for the caffeine!

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Upgrade

I wrote a tweet, a few days ago, where I mentioned my new insulin pump set up appointment. It's been a long time in the coming. You may have read some of my Path to Pumping blog posts, which began in 2021 and ran into this year. I'm still on "The Path" but the finishing line is very much in sight. It's been a journey, only matched by reality TV contestants as they reach the final stages before returning to a life of obscurity, and I'm delighted to finally be moving on - on to a new NHS funded pump and consumables and a reassuring warranty. 

The tweet? Yes, I noted that the upgrading of Diabetes tech is a strange, almost emotional, affair. Not at all like upgrading a phone or a TV. I thought nothing more of it yet, the tweet got a surprising amount of Likes and some offered their thoughts which seemed to be in agreement. Fantastic, I do enjoy social media engagement. However, that particular tweet must've reached more eyeballs than I thought and, following a few messages and emails, I'll be talking to Diabetes UK's Balance magazine on Sunday to discuss the subject of T1D and tech & upgrades.

The subject has been bouncing around in my brain since agreeing to the interview. The words of others have found my "hard relate" button. I don't know of any other technology to have had such a profound affect on my life. A car certainly changes a person's life, affording us more freedom, and if you pass your driving test at 17 then freedom is a huge thing! But, if I didn't pass my test, didn't get a car, then I suspect my life would've gone in a similar direction - probably less nipping out for a takeaway! Indeed, I haven't driven for 12 years and I've got by thanks to various other drivers. Really, that's as close as other technology has got to matching diabetes tech for me and it's still a million miles away.

I think the subject underlines just how much I value my health, today compared to the the years gone by and also how incredibly important access to this technology is. I've seen the data for things such as HbA1c and Flash / CGM use, there are likely similar numbers kicking around for insulin pumps and, lately, looping. The cold, hard, numbers are important but they don't give the full picture. 

Technology has reduced my T1D burden beyond how I can express it in words. I feel that it's reduced it to such an extent that I don't have the T1D that I used to have. It does't feel like the full condition, now. Don't get me wrong, it's still absolutely crap on many occasions but not nearly as much work as when life was full of injections and finger pricks. I've noted many times; I'm blessed. My fund raising for Action 4 Diabetes and learning about their work in South East Asia has really underlined to me just how blessed I am.

The pump switch over is on Monday afternoon and I'm really going to miss this little black chunk of plastic and metal and battery. I've upgraded my CGMs, moved to different ones, taken CGM breaks, etc many times in the last 5 years but since starting on pump therapy I've remained on pump therapy. That'll be 15 months without an insulin injection. I've grown to love the pump. It's on my person all the time unless I'm taking a shower, we go on walks together, meals out, it's met my friends and I spoon it to sleep at night. Next week, it'll be safely back in its box with the battery removed. Another will take its place and do the same job in keeping me alive and well. Soon after, I'll say goodbye forever as the old pump is sent to another living with T1D. I promised to pay it forward and that's what will happen.

Not exactly a tear jerking moment, I know. It's a great moment for me and the next person to use the old pump. Paying it forward is a great thing, too. If you do find yourself in possession of spares then try to not let them waste away. There is nearly always somebody else who can use your old tech or consumables so pass them on... oh! and don't go profiting from it. I know some have sold pumps and fair enough if you bought it in the first instance but, if that tech came from the NHS then please give it back so they can use it to train staff members - assuming you know of nobody who you can pass it to for free. 

Upgrading diabetes tech is so different to upgrading our home technologies, our cars, the machines we use at work, etc. None of those will likely improve your health, I suspect very few of them wake up with you in the morning and it's unlikely that you'll get the opportunity or have the inclination to pay them forward.

 Thank you so much for reading this blog. I do appreciate your visit and your support. As you might know, I LOVE COFFEE! So I've teamed up with a thing called Buy Me A Coffee. If you enjoy my content and appreciate the time it takes to create such things then you can buy me a coffee! If you leave your Twitter @ name when you buy me a coffee, I will personally thank you. If you'd rather be anonymous then that's totally cool. Thanks for the caffeine!

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Peers

I have many photos of my peers and those guys are a very photogenic bunch! and I consider them to be my friends, too. To use one of those photos might mean neglecting friends from other photos. Anyway! That's the long explanation of why I've chosen a photo from FRIENDS the TV show rather than one of my own. My diabetes friends are my peers, there is a very strong bond between many of us. I'll be there for yoooouuuu!

I took part in the Diabetes Chat 24hr chat bonanza! yesterday. I had an hour to talk to Jules from Enough Now DOC and GBDoc to talk about safety within the diabetes community, peer support and a little about mental health. I think the conversation flowed well, from hearing about unsavoury incidents and characters to how to stay safe online and in the general community, then how peer support has impacted and benefited many across the GBDoc community. Meeting and communicating with members of the community has certainly lifted my mental health when it comes to living with T1D and I think I'm right in saying that others have had a similar experience.

I have lost count of the number of people who I've met at the events & get togethers which I've attended. I mentioned in the Diabetes Chat; I've yet to have a poor experience from meeting my peers. Each time, there has been a new story, new information or a new face to meet. Sometimes, I've been able to directly help somebody. From the accessing of the tech that they need to some gentle words of encouragement and everything in between. I've been on the opposite side of that coin, too! Several diabetes tech gadgets have found their way into my lap, a direct result of meeting my peers. Those gadgets have undoubtedly helped me to maintain or improve aspects of my T1D management. 

Without peers, where would my T1D be? I suspect that I'd be using a Libre but, likely still injecting 8 to 10 times per day instead of using a pump (soon to be replaced with a brand new NHS funded one) and instead of using a CGM - a direct result of me tweeting about T1D and being recognised as somebody worthy of being gifted a device. Without peers, my burden would be much more than it is today. Diabetes aside, my private life would be far less rich as well. I have a WhatsApp which is heaving with messages and group messages from friends. No longer are they simply "peers" and no longer is the conversation driven by our lack of beta cells.

The Diabetes Chat event was littered with my friends and peers. After I'd had my hour with Jules, I just listened when time allowed. It was brilliant to see the names of online friends, joining in and telling their stories and offering their opinions. I was very pleased to see Alex take the hot seat to present the GBDoc Quiz and equally pleased that Mo agreed to lead the Tweetchat segment to assist Jules. Alex and Mo are frequent names in the Twitter GBDoc community but I don't remember hearing them speak very often, aside from the Zoom quizzes and when I interviewed Alex for a Dad Chats to... They're lovely people and, if they read this, I'd like to encourage both to push for more opportunities. The same goes for others within the diabetes community - You're just as important as the frequently heard voices, the voices with a social media presence and the voices who work within diabetes. Personally, I enjoy listening to the infrequently heard voice rather than a repeated narrative. 

Monday (tomorrow, after this blog is published) sees the publication of a new NHS document. "The Six Principles of Peer Support" appears to have been a long time in the 

coming. There is much chatter in my circles about what to expect. I'm certainly very interested in what the NHS will come up with following private discussions with a few who live with T1D. There is absolutely many positives to peer support and my hopes are high that the NHS will only enhance what is already there. 

Monday is also World Diabetes Day. Perhaps you'll mark the day, perhaps you won't. Your diabetes, your rules. Personally, I'm going to the pub for an afternoon with my friends. It just so happens they have diabetes, too!

Thank you so much for reading this blog. I do appreciate your visit and your support. As you might know, I LOVE COFFEE! So I've teamed up with a thing called Buy Me A Coffee. If you enjoy my content and appreciate the time it takes to create such things then you can buy me a coffee! If you leave your Twitter @ name when you buy me a coffee, I will personally thank you. If you'd rather be anonymous then that's totally cool. Thanks for the caffeine!

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Was It The Cinnamon?!

 I've recently fallen into a YouTube "rabbit hole". Having watched someone survive on £1 for an entire day, the same chap then went on to describe his favourite "cheap" meals. One of those meals was a fried banana sandwich - made from bread which he baked himself. It looked pretty good and, because I'm not surviving on £1 per day, I added some sugar and cinnamon to my own fried banana sandwich. It was really good! The cinnamon really brought it to life and I've made the same sandwich several times, since.

Cinnamon! Ah, yes the frequently touted and often mocked cure for diabetes! Of course, it won't cure your diabetes and that's why it's often mocked but it does taste pretty good on various things. Strange, though, that after recently eating a lot more cinnamon (I really like a fried banana sandwich) I've finally been able to stop taking medication which I've been on for around 10 years.

I've had to take eye drops since developing retinopathy and various other eye nasties in 2010. The drops have changed, based on my changing condition, a couple of times. The latest batch began in 2014 and they were prescribed to control pressure and irritation. Very successful they were, too! After my 2014 surgery, I have been stable in the peepers. I thought that was down to a combination of better T1D management and my 2 x 2 eye drops per day. I might be right in regards to the T1D management but it seems that things have changed in the eyes dept.

Earlier this year, my eye surgeon suggested that I should stop taking the drops to "see if anything changes". I did that for around a week in the summer only to find my appointment had been rescheduled. Frustrating! But, during that week, I never noticed any real discomfort in my eye. Encouraged, I tried again before the latest appointment in the world's hottest clinic. 

If you've ever had ocular hypertension then you'll probably know the pain. Just like blood glucose levels, eyes have pressure levels that are given values. A normal value is in the teens, give or take a point or two. In 2014, my eye pressure was 44. I was immediately put on a drip to drop the pressure. I've suffered many pains in my life but eye pressure pain is by far the worst thing that I've ever felt. It lasted for 24 hours before I was able to get the drip into my hand and find relief. 24 hours of agony feels like a very long time, i wouldn't wish that pain on anybody. So, to be asked to stop the eye drops which help to control pressure was certainly a worry.

It's been over two weeks since I stopped the drops, 10 days since leaving the sauna ward, and all is stable in that eye. I don't know if I'll ever need to go back to the drops or if that's the end but I'm delighted. To just wake each day and do the T1D thing without reaching for two bottles and a tissue as well, to go to bed without fumbling around, late at night, for the same... it's less work! and it's less burden. This felt like life in 2009! only with better T1D management and no midlife crisis. 

Was it the cinnamon, though?!  

No. Let's not be silly. I've likely needed to stop the drops for a while. I have stability in both eyes and despite my visual impairment I consider myself to be very lucky and happy with my lot. Blessings counted.

To end this little blog post, I'd like to encourage you to always attend your eye screening appointments and any follow up appointments and to go for any treatments that you might need. I don't want any of you to go through the pain and darkness (physically and mentally) that I went through. If you do attend your appointments then you can reduce the chances of anything nasty happening to your eyes. Some of you will already be living with visual impairments and going through your own personal battles. Please don't ever give up on medical science, new treatments and new technologies. Ask about them, ask FOR them! and share your story without fear. There is no shame in having diabetes related eye complications.

Try the fried banana sandwich, too! :

- 2 slices of white bread, remove crusts

- 1 small sliced banana

- Some sugar (brown works best) and some ground cinnamon

Heat a tablespoon of butter in a pan, place the bread in the pan, add the banana to one slice while the bread browns and sprinkle your cinnamon and sugar on the banana. Flip the banana-less slice of bread on the top and flatten with a spatula. Turn a few times to brown evenly and sprinkle a little more sugar on each side.

You'll need insulin.  

Thank you so much for reading this blog. I do appreciate your visit and your support. As you might know, I LOVE COFFEE! So I've teamed up with a thing called Buy Me A Coffee. If you enjoy my content and appreciate the time it takes to create such things then you can buy me a coffee! If you leave your Twitter @ name when you buy me a coffee, I will personally thank you. If you'd rather be anonymous then that's totally cool. Thanks for the caffeine!

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Too Much Or Not Enough

I'm a very vocal advocate of individuality in diabetes. I've certainly used the "YDMV" (Your Diabetes May Vary) acronym many times during discussion and when expressing a view. Type 1 Diabetes is often viewed as simply injecting or pumping insulin to manage consumed carbohydrates and I'm fine with that. I think if you don't have T1D, live with a diabetic or work in the world of diabetes then why would you know much more? It's not wrong, of course, but it doesn't really cover more than the very basics.

Inside of our world (assuming you live with T1D, live with a diabetic, work in diabetes, etc) you probably realise that it's so much more than carbs and Banting Juice. All the decisions that we make are well documented and there are likely lots more that differ from person to person. You might have your own unique decisions to make in regards to your diabetes because you're an individual, living your own life and managing your own diabetes. Diabetes mirrors life in various ways and certainly, for me, the differences between person to person is one of those ways.

I think I've stated the obvious and I'll get to my point and what the title of this blog means!

I've recently mentored a few of my peers in regards to their T1D, you may have read about some of that on the Twitter. The vast differences between those people and the hundreds of other peers who I've engaged with is apparent but one thing which crops up frequently is some of the advice given by HCPs - advice which I'm struggling to understand and it looks a little something like this:

"You're scanning your Libre too much"

 "You're not finger pricking enough"

"You don't need to check your CGM that often"

Those three pieces of advice might be right, of course. My own experience is based upon the "too much scanning" advice. It was likely well meaning! I had complained about injection burnout which may have been confused with general burnout. A high number of sensor scans may have raised a red flag and well meaning advice followed. It was the wrong advice because, for me, I wasn't scanning too much. Why? I live my life in my way as an individual. Scanning a sensor, when your phone is often in your hand due to work and other commitments, was not tasking me or burning me out. Perhaps if I was working 10 hours a day as a taxi driver or heart surgeon then the same number of scans would be difficult or even impossible and noteworthy as a cause of burnout. 

"You're scanning too much" doesn't take into account me as a person with my own life. It compares me to others and even the HCP's life experience and what they believe to be the right amount. I stated why I scan as often as I do and why it's not a problem and we moved on. I don't fear speaking up during a consultation but I do know that others have issues in that setting and they feel anxious about doing anything unless they're nodding in agreement with an HCP.

"You seem to be scanning your Libre a lot. Is that causing you any problems?" might be a better way to address that red flag. But who am I to talk about communication!? *wink*

The same could be said for the other two pieces of advice, above. To notice something a little unusual is right and great care and it should be questioned but never judged or followed with a sweeping statement. "Too much" might be just right, "not enough" might be just right. Great care considers individuality and works with that. Ask questions, talk to your patient, get more information.

The above three pieces of advice might seem innocuous and to some that might be right, to others it might pile pressure on to an already over-spilling plate of decisions and burden and stress. That's why I'm very vocal about HCPs treating us as individuals in every respect and why it makes great sense to treat each other in the same way.  

 As you might have seen, a conflict has broken out in Ukraine as Russia has invaded that country. The scenes on TV and on social media are horrifying. What can we do? Well, I don't think there is a wrong way to help if you donate to charities who are active in helping the people of Ukraine. I support many charities but one which has always had my heart is MSF. Medecins Sans Frontieres translates as Doctors Without Borders. When it comes to the health of others in disaster areas, war zones and the like then I think we all have a duty to do what we can to help and help those who directly help! such as MSF. With that in mind, all donations to me via Buy Me a Coffee and all the pennies generated through the ads dotted around my pages will be donated to MSF. I will make up the difference for the fees taken by PayPal and Buy Me a Coffee. That will run until further notice, no time frames and possibly until Ukraine is a free country again. Thank you for reading my blog. 

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Take It Easy

A couple of days ago, I tweeted about Time In Range. It was a tweet inspired by my previous week of blood glucose data which saw six days of fabulous numbers then one day of less than fabulous. As day 7 progressed and I struggled to establish a BG under 10, I felt the frustration build. My 24hr TIR was 33% and I was beginning to get pretty irritated by what I was seeing. Perhaps that is something you've experienced? Our hard work can pay off on one day then the same hard work just will not yield the same results on another day. Annoying, huh?!

Prior to that TIR tweet, I had recently been involved in many discussions surrounding research. I'm rarely dismissive of any single person's experience unless it is dressed up as research. It is pretty difficult to accurately conclude a study based upon your own data, your own research of... yourself! There are tonnes of problems with that from having the absolute minimum in sample size to your own biased, skewed, point of view. Research should involve big numbers, where possible. Many aspects of Diabetes are researched to form what is deemed as a good opinion or even safe advice. Not all of that "research" has been conducted adequately to form a good conclusion. I'll leave it to you, reader, to discover the shoddy research which backs some aspects of Diabetes. Back to TIR!...

...and big numbers, your research, should apply when you're concluding how things are going in regards to your own management and your Time In Range. So, after the initial frustration of 33% TIR I made a coffee and had a few biscuits (bolused for, ofc) and relaxed. One poor day doesn't represent how hard I work to take care of my T1D. The same could be said for any period, really. A bad year isn't enough data to determine how hard you work to take care of your lifetime with T1D - maybe that bad year is only 2% of your time with T1D and you've been living through a pretty rough 12 months, personally? Perhaps there isn't an obvious reason because, as Diabetes loves to prove, there are very often no apparent reasons for what's going on.

The title of this blog post is Take It Easy and I think it's time for me to worry less about day to day fluctuations in my Time In Range. I have a lot of history and TIR data since using an insulin pump. I know that I float around 77% - 80% and I know that is a pretty good level of management so, why should I stress about a very tiny snapshot in time? I'm certainly going to try to be less of a drama llama about the numbers in future and try to remember my own words; you'll never be a perfect diabetic - there is no such person. Easier said than done! but I'll try.

I wonder if I/we worry about the wayward days because of the nature of our condition. Essentially, our body is attacking itself and we have no control over that happening despite it being OUR BODY! That's the crazy thing about this autoimmune disease; We have absolutely no say and no control in it happening. When it's here, we're left with trying to manage it to stay alive and stay well, no easy task. Perhaps now we have the tech and the data to establish some form of control, we think we can tame the beast every single day. Maybe we tame the beast so well, so often, that when we do have a wayward day it feels far more stressful and worrisome than it might if we were managing our T1D via guesses and infrequent finger pricks. 

All our technology and information is massively helpful (to me, at least) but it doesn't guarantee perfection, it is certainly not a cure. 

So, I'll end this short blog by encouraging you to not beat yourself up over your Diabetes and everything related to it. You will make mistakes and you will do everything right - that's called being human. Doing your best as often as you can is all you should aim for. Your best is not the T1D management of somebody else. You do you.

As you might have seen, a conflict has broken out in Ukraine as Russia has invaded that country. The scenes on TV and on social media are horrifying. What can we do? Well, I don't think there is a wrong way to help if you donate to charities who are active in helping the people of Ukraine. I support many charities but one which has always had my heart is MSF. Medecins Sans Frontieres translates as Doctors Without Borders. When it comes to the health of others in disaster areas, war zones and the like then I think we all have a duty to do what we can to help and help those who directly help! such as MSF. With that in mind, all donations to me via Buy Me a Coffee and all the pennies generated through the ads dotted around my pages will be donated to MSF. I will make up the difference for the fees taken by PayPal and Buy Me a Coffee. That will run until further notice, no time frames and possibly until Ukraine is a free country again. Thank you for reading my blog. 

BUY DIABETIC DAD (MSF) A COFFEE HERE

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